Hey Reader,

It's me, coming to you live from post baby number two life. Phew, she's a ride.

There is nothing like forced time away from your business to get you comparing everything that happens in life to business.

So join me on a sleep deprived tangent if you will...

A somewhat nice part of having a small babe with you (versus a feral toddler or loud 5 year old who likes to talk about vulvas in the supermarket lololol) is that people really want to strike up a conversation with you about your baby. Very positive vibes.

Except... they also get quite miffed if they can't tell which flavour your baby happens to be. The gender fascination is interesting in and of itself but the lashing out from little old women when they can't tell instantly boy from girl... wow! Who hurt you Doris?

"Oh you're one of those gender neutral people" with an eye roll has been thrown my way before I can even RESPOND to the unspoken question... literally since I was in hospital high AF on trammies post c-section.

It's clear that the way I dress my baby and what that communicates (or doesn't communicatie) inconveniences some people.

And when my random interactions with the Doris's of the world are making up approx 50% of my daily adult conversations and are sometimes my only trip outside the house for the day... it could be easy to take it all a bit too seriously and personally and think I'm doing something wrong.

Because absolutely Doris is displaying her irritation that I am not doing the thing she wants me to do. And has no qualms in letting this sleep deprived wild haired woman in the supermarket know it.

And it got me thinking about business, and the uncomfortable feeling when our decisions are inconvenient to others, when our way of working or communicating or delivering is being criticised or frowned upon. And how often our default response is to cater to others and assume we're the problem.

Of course the key difference here is that Doris isn't paying for access to me or paying for my baby's very stylish and colourful outfits. So my ability to respond is unhampered by the usual social rules, and I love an awkward zinger ("Oh you want to know about my baby's genitals? Ok...."

When it's our clients who are letting us know they feel inconvenienced it's a little more challenging because we're often in a power imbalance. The one who pays the invoices gets all the say right?

Business is always a bit of a negotiation. And absolutely we all want happy clients. But also we don't have to own other people's feelings. We aren't the fixer of all less than positive experiences or feelings.

But we should all have a standard process of how to communicate with our clients especially when they are feeling some kinda way... that includes listening, asking questions, providing evidence behind your position and pointing the ship back towards their strategic goals.

And we need to learn that it's totally acceptable to return the emotional baggage of inconvenience to sender, because it's not ours to own. Even when we're being paid.

Love your work,

Rachel

In finest Rachel-esque form, I am hitting the ground RUNNING in October, kicking off with an in person No Bullshit Business Planning Day in Hamilton. It's an intimate group day held at the Novotel Tainui, and I'll even shout you dinner. Hit reply if you want to know more or grab your spot below (3 spots left!)

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